Morning Ramblings

There was no work yesterday and I spent the entire day thinking it was Saturday. Not a problem but now it is the real Saturday.So housework, laundry and grocery shopping loom. Also tomorrow I have set a meeting tomorrow of travelers tomorrow.
So there will be no quiet day staying in and doing nothing much.

To be honest, I enjoy being alone. I also enjoy being with people. But the alone time is a necessary evil in my life.
After being among the people at work etc 5 to 6 days a week ,I need one day when my doors are closed to the world. I rather think it is a result of being an only child of older parents. Mom was 29 and Dad was 30 when I came along which at that time was old for first time parents. I grew up in a quiet house made even quieter during the week as Dad was a traveling salesman. Mom worked and when I was old enough I worked but on weekends we were just us.Dad would come home and we would do family things.So today the weekend to me means downtime--time to read, do crosswords,binge on television and lately to write.

Being single at my age through choice not widowhood is fine with me. I am content with myself though at times I am a bit unhappy with myself as I suspect are all people. I like the independence I have to make my own schedule outside of work. I can read all day if the book captures me, wear pajamas all day, graze for hunger pangs rather than cooking, come and go as I please and avoid sports on television( though many women enjoy it,) Sounds a bit selfish and may be it is but I do not think it is a selfishness that forces itself on others.

Now do not get me wrong I enjoy people. Just this week I ate out two nights in a row with friends. We laughed, share stories, whined about little burps in our lives. I came home happy and glad of the companionship. I enjoy working because
I am in the world and doing the work I do( teaching and as a ESl para) fulfills my need to be involved and helping others. It can exhaust me both physically and mentally but my soul feels as if it has done what it is called to do. The world is fully in my life on the weekdays, It is an energetic state and satisfying.

I guess it goes back to a question of balance. Just as life has its ups and downs, it needs quiet and companionship. Life is not static;it is constantly in a state of change.The balance between these states allows us to both bloom and vegetate and to retain our sanity.