Tuesday, December 18, 2012

My mother pulled me out of public schools not because of any real principle along religious or moral lines. I could read at third grade level entering kindergarten due to a bout of polio and the public school wanted to place in that grade. Mom said no and called her childhood pal Father Kazmareck and asked to enroll me at St. Teresa’s which across the street from our house. So my life was set for several years, During the school week I did everything my classmates did catechism, mass daily stations of the cross during lent and all the prayers including a daily rosary after lunch. Saturdays I attended the religious instruction at our Lutheran church.

Most of my tenure at ST. T’s was highlighted by Father Kaz. He laughed, giggled and slapped my mother’s butt to get her attention when she was pulling weeds. Why did he do it? To make sure she and only she would pack his lunch for the school picnic. He was a Hawaiian shirted. Khaki pants priest who made life and religion joyful if not very serious. However, all that was to change when his assistant pastor arrived in my sixth grade year.

Father Ritz was an escapee from behind the curtain where practicing your faith could mean death. Perhaps that though we students did not think of it at the time explained the man who was a polar opposite to Kaz. Father Ritz to this day I cannot shorten his title wore cassocks so starched the edges looked like knives, only during mass was the berretta gone from his head. He walked so quietly he was behind you before you knew it. If you were “sinning “ his hand would go to your shoulder and he would march you to the chapel where you and he would sit in silent contemplation of your error. Not one word of displeasure or reprimand just silence until the words “forgive me” issued forth and several Hail Mary’s were assigned. That silence was more forceful than all the laughing, “do not do agains” from Kaz.

Friday confessions were fraught with wonderment. Who was the priest in the booth? As a protestant I sat in the Mary row (yes we had ten Mary’s in my class and we had our own pew) closest to the booth. The Marys expected me to check out the shoes beneath the curtain. Loafers or sandals and they breathed a sigh of relief. If the shoes shone like patent leather and were laced oxfords, they began to reduce the things they would confess.

Ritz was not feared but he was not attainable. Silence surrounded him. Idle conversation was not his style. When he spoke, it mattered. They only time I feared him was the day I asked if Mary had had other children after Jesus. His hand slowly rose with a finger pointing to the door as he quietly said out protestant. Yet to give him his due, he was also the one who hand on my shoulder brought me back into class with a quiet forgive me. An adult who could admit his error, I was stunned.

But the image that still moves me is one again of near silence. Having forgotten my school bag in the chapel I ran across the street after supper to retrieve it. Going down to the chapel, I stopped when I noticed someone praying. Father Ritz knelt in a pew, sunlight streaming on him from the stained glass window. His hands so long lean and strong were moving his wooden rosary beads as tears flowed down his cheeks. I stood for a moment in a silence broken only by the clacking beads and then tiptoed up the stairs. My schoolbag could wait: I was sure I had seen a saint.


Monday, December 10, 2012

Thankful today for the graded papers. i am glad to be done.I am also glad that they were good in both classes. thankful also that i did not slip on ice formed form the water i yard due to fact that i forgot to turn off the sprinkler system. it has been a good day.

Friday, December 7, 2012

Thankful entry tonight is short. I am thankful papers are turned in, and next week the college break begins.Thankful also the hs semester is winding down=== projects and review left. New material comes when we return. Really thankful this is the weekend and that I have a knitting class tomorrow to relax me or frustrate me in a different manner. That's all folks; no wise words tonight.

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

THE JOURNEY

The end of the year is drawing near and I have been reflecting on my journey or my growth through out this life i live. Born in Ohio, I was raised mainly in Nebraska with sojourns in Missouri and various other sites. My parents took everywhere with them and many of the trips i can not recall. Too young but one was to Mexico city d.f. and for the first time I was brought face to face with something that was not the American lifestyle or expectations. Changed me forever as I still enjoy other cultures and am willing to taste their food, walk their streets, and try their pace of life. what have I gained form this? A realization that there is not just one way of life and a tolerance for the differences among the world's peoples and an a greater appreciation of how we do not differ in the most basic needs.

An only child born to older(DAD was 30 ;Mom 19) the skills of being part of social interaction could have been hard to learn. But the 30+ cousins on mom's side ranging in age form 15 years older to 6 years younger taught me those lessons which I promptly passed on to the two younger ( both only girls also) on y dad's side of the family tree. It was also firmly implanted in me that i was no better than anyone else by the nun's at Saint T's in Lincoln, Ne. and classmates in three states. Some of those lessons were difficult but now I admit necessary.

One big life lesson was watching my marriage fail after twenty -five years. I found out that one person can not make a marriage work and though I have not remarried by choice i do not regret the marriage and my three daughters from the union. I regret the loss of what a thought was a life love; yet. admittedly my life is rich and full and more traveled than it would have been otherwise.

My faith journey has been interesting. Mom an ex catholic sent to ST T's because I read at third grade level in kindergarten( had polio and learned to entertain myself) and no way would she let the public school bump up several notches. So religion lessons, daily mass, rosaries before lunch and stations of the became part of my school life. Heck I even stayed at the convent when Mom when back east as her father was ill. To have balance I went to Lutheran school on Saturday for religion on Dad's side. Now I am Catholic you know how the twig is bent but having trouble since the last election with being told how to vote. Mass Has not seen me for a month now but am feeling the need to get back.

More journey at a later date. time to head for my classes that I teach at HCC ( a junior college) and French is over at the high school In Buhler.

Monday, December 3, 2012

So what am I thankful for today. for quiet home. for a party i got booked for dana
for the supper i ate--pork chops with rosemary and Guiness used in the cooking and mixed vegetables, for the laughs with students, for kindnesses in life. It has been a thankful day.

Right now all three dogs are by my feet. Well Winston is 1/2 on my lap for a love but in a second he will stretch out with a sigh. Omg ! the chihuahuas are on the sheet on the floor and Winston has the bed. wonders never cease.Of course Winston has to chew on it.

111 year old in Australia says knittng is the reason she has lived so long. Knew there was a reason I keep learning new stitches and methods. Lessons for gloves this weekend.

More later.

Sunday, December 2, 2012

day 2 thankful journal

Thankful that I got the deck winterized;cushions off and stored. I am also thankful i got some of the extra catalogs etc and boxes organized to toss. I also got some reading done. Small things but they add up and make my quiet day worth while.

Big thankful for the hour with Amber At Hastings talking about classes and future plans. Some " gritching " about things that bug us. Tension relief and laughs and coffee. Hope everybody can do that every so often. It feels so good.

Yep this journal thing makes me see that I am blessed.













Saturday, December 1, 2012

thankful journal

So here I am again.No excuse except life got to me. Still I have made myself a promise--each day even if it is one thing and only one line I WILL WRITE WHAT MADE ME GRATEFUL THAT DAY.

Today that thing is more than one.First this semester of night classes is drawing to a close and I am thankful for open roads and safe trips---especially on the nights I left my cell phone elsewhere. 2 more weeks and i hope the roads stay un-icy but light wet snow would be a blessing in this tired area.

Second i am thankful for pals to whom I can speak my mind and still be accepted. this is not always possible but intelligent discussion of views even when radically different is interesting and invigorating. may have lost a few 'FRIENDS" THIS LAST ELECTION CYCLE BUT ARE THEY TRULY FRIENDS WHEN THEY INSIST YOU FOLLOW THEM.
MY PETS ARE NUMBER THREE BUT IN MY HEART THEY ARE HIGHER THAN THAT. THEY MAKE ME LAUGH, GREET ME WHEN I COME HOME. SHARE MY HAPPY AND SAD MOMENTS.sorry about the caps but maybe i should emphasize that I am a crazy dog lady to some but petting them lowers my blood pressure and fills my soul with content.

Now I have made a beginning. thanks for reading.